STOP, PAUSE, FEEL

Dec 31 / Nancy Andino, LCSW, CASAC

STOP, PAUSE, FEEL: Be intentional with your New Year’s Resolutions

Let’s do things differently this year so by March you’re not beating yourself up. Every year you hear, see and talk with friends, colleagues and family members about New Years resolutions.

The resolutions trap can sound like this:
“I will work out 3-5 x a week”
“I will make more money this year”
“I will be more focus”
“I will be kinder to myself” 
“I will start therapy and stick to it”

Self-Compassion as your guide:  

With all the societal challenges and daily stressors being experienced, it is important that we practice mindfulness and press the Pause and at times the STOP! button. I recommend Intentionality with your New Year's resolution goals with a side of self-compassion. You can start by asking yourself the following questions

  • Why is this New Years resolution a goal?
  • Am I fully committed to the goal or is it something I am simply interested in?      

    Is it my goal or is it someone else’s?
    Is it based on comparisons or is it authentically me?
  • How will it support me as a whole being?  


Once you have answered the questions and reflected on your goals, the next step is to harness your power.

The Power of Intentionality:

When you practice being intentional, you get the opportunity to choose your next move. When you have a choice, you can respond to situations as your best self. This gives you a sense of control because of the opportunity you have created. Practicing intentionality allows you to feel, notice, and become aware. You can improve through repetition and as a result gain experience of what is real and what you’re making up.

Notice if your body and brain are aligned in the decision making or if you’re forcing yourself to do and change something because you HAVE to.  

The you must!  feeling and thought never lasts as a motivator, because you are not giving yourself the option to do things differently. You can shift from have to, to I have the option to. With practice you will learn the difference, and in those moments, you can decide if it’s worth it or not.  

I invite you to walk into the New Year with intentionality and a willingness to practice pausing; your body, mind and future self will thank you for it. Resolutions can be simple. They should not make the journey feel overwhelming or take the fun away. They don’t have to be huge tasks. They also don’t need to look the same every year just because that is the tradition.
What intentional changes are you willing to embrace this year?  




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